I’m not humble

From a young age, we are taught to be humble. That we ought to defer to the experienced, to the credentialed, to the "experts". But, I've changed my mind. I've decided to disagree. I'm simply much more skilled than some people.

I've decided to stop the faux humility. I'm simply better than them.

A recent step change I've had, probably about three years ago, was becoming aware of how much more skilled I am than the average person at computers.

It took 5 years of deprogramming to finally become capable of saying it. The thing that finally changed me? Seeing inexperienced engineers run circles around me. Coming online and seeing "old" engineers learn new things in under a week, and do amazing things.

Learning things that people told me were too hard and realizing that it was in fact, quite simple.

This seems easy, simple, obvious. And it also seems like you could make a lot of money doing this. Why hasn't anyone done it yet?

It couldn't be because people suck. No! That would be insane.. all of these <experts> - and no one noticed this extremely obvious observation?

Yes, no one has. They are all wrong. You are right. They are simply stupid. And you are simply right. Have you broken it down? Have you run the code yourself? Have you seen it work?

Sometimes, even after doing the actual thing themselves, people will fool themselves into thinking its impossible. It's right there in front of you! That's how deep the programming has been.

We go to public schools, and learn from normal teachers, trying to teach normal students. Everyone asks you what you will do after highschool. Something normal! Go to university. Like a normal person. Under normal guard rails. Keeping you normal. Rewarding you for being normal. Stamping out any abnormality out of you.

Stop. Being. Normal

I need you to look at being average, at doing what everyone else has done, at doing what has always worked with contempt. I need you to think you're better. I need you to think that you can TRY to be better. That it's okay to fail! It's okay to not know everything! It's okay to make mistakes. It's okay!

If you thought you were normal you'd never try something out of the ordinary. You would be ordinary.

Pareto

The vast majority of people are alien to the average hacker. It doesn't take much, the bottom 90 percentile in capability are only separated by a smidgen of agency. Have you seen the right tail? The skill ceiling?

Most "ML researchers" graduating from a >masters program don't even know what pytorch and cuda is. I'm not kidding. They're not trying to do things. They're looking for a comfortable sandbox. Living off of the spoils of the technology that our ancestors created. Fat, from nitrogen farmed by the Bohr-Haber process.

Humility is what made me stop being humble. It forced me into awareness. I've seen software engineers with skills so incredible that you couldn't believe. I could have easily given up.

"They’re just smarter than me"

Or, you can not give up. You can become aware of the fact that there is nothing different, between you and him. Born in Canada. Relatively smart parents. Decent education. What is different? Tell me?

Make the pilgrimage to the right tail of the distribution. See what it's like. I've seen NEETs that became multi millionaires because they were bored. They grew up on 4chan just like me. They can code, just like me. What's different?

Nothing. Nothing is different.

Being outwardly humble is in fact, a side effect of lack of humility. A lack of capability to accept that everything is in your own control.